Happy Canada Day everyone!
Today I wanted to discuss a little something that happened with a friend of mine recently. You see I have this lovely friend named Kaitlyn, she is a trans woman, and recently we went down to Toronto together and my father provided us with a ride so we wouldn’t have to take transit and we could save our money. Obviously Kaitlyn presented as female and had her hair and makeup on and such so naturally my father saw this. I didn’t really think this was a big deal seeing as my dad is pretty quiet about such things anyway. The rest of the day went swimmingly and when it was time to go home my father once again offered to drive us. Score! More money saved on transit thanks to the male parental unit.
Here is where the issue began.
When calling home to let my dad know we were ready my mom answered and sounded about ready to chew me out. She passively mentioned Kaitlyn’s earlier decision to come dressed to Toronto in her makeup and such and sounded almost angry at me for allowing her to do so in front of dad. I was immediately infuriated and prepared myself for a confrontation as soon as they would have me alone. My parents may be able to ask me to compromise on my freedom of expression for the sake of their comfortability but they are fucking with me if they think I am going to ask that of my friend. She has every right to wear what makes her comfortable and she is in no way obligated to change herself because it makes them feel weird. For safety reasons (she would be busing home by herself once we re-entered our hometown from Toronto) she changed into less obvious attire seeing as our area is very much so not safe for Trans folk.
Fast forward past all the boring car ride home bullshit and we dropped Kate off at the bus terminal and headed home, I held my breath in nervous anticipation.
“It’s not safe for her to be dressed like that,”
I was shocked five different shades of what the actual fuck. Turns out my dads entire issue was that he (like myself) lacks trust in people and was concerned for our safety. Once I explained to him that I had her in a safe environment he was all cool with her female representation. He was concerned that someone would see her and beat us up because he assumes all people are assholes and are not to be trusted. For once I was wrong and I’m able to admit that… for once.
I jumped to conclusions and assumed the worst about my dad when he was really just trying to look out for us. This one entry is short because I just really wanted to share that with you all. It’s something small in the grand scale of things but I am immensely proud of him and how far he’s come in his acceptance. He still isn’t doing as well as my mom but still a lot better then he was before, so, A+ dad!
Anyway guys, remember that people have the power to change and expand their minds and that thought alone is enough to give me courage for the future.
Stay Tobly Awesome till tomorrow everyone!
Happy Canada Day everyone!